I have a feeling I am approaching a black hole, something that everyone talks about but yet no one knows what is inside a black hole. I've never felt like this for a very long time. The uncertain feeling is creepy.
I'm often overseeing and in a clear state of mind that what I'm getting myself into but this time I sorta went a lil too far as if I'm walking in a mine field blind folded. This is seriously giving me cold feet. I hate to get myself involved in situation like this where by I can't gauge an outcome at all.
Well and what did the old folks say? I should really be just working and spending time with family and friends just like what I did post the previous relationship a.k.a. "The disaster". Back to where I was, so this mind bogging situation started when I realised that there are some pretty wicked history similar but not comparable to what I've gone through. Now knowing that I am pretty good at forgiving (ie: being a sucker), I think I have a large tendency to get myself into trouble again.
It is not about having a bad past because I believe some could escape and eventually find new life. Some continue to abuse it as if everyone else is just part of the game and can be used as a tool to achieve their satisfaction. After surviving my previous disaster I could probably be a guru at teaching people how to spot a cheater. Alright jokes aside, the reason I'm writing this is because I am again considering to build a relationship concurrently as I build my career hence commitment level is high and a lot of mutual understanding is required. Knowing the fact that I require heaps of attention and security I doubt I could find anyone that fits in the picture hence I made a vow to stay single and enjoy life to the fullest and report to no one except maybe my Saviour, Lord.
In terms of statistics I might be lucky to experienced disastrous partner(s) which I've treated them as soul mate (just like what you read in fairy tales "happily ever after") but in actual fact you wished you were never born when you realised you have to wear that gigantic "green" hat. So now as I continue to journey through this young adult life, should I pursue to take a peek in the black hole or should I just avoid, knowing that nothing will survive in it?
"Trust must be earned"
I'm often overseeing and in a clear state of mind that what I'm getting myself into but this time I sorta went a lil too far as if I'm walking in a mine field blind folded. This is seriously giving me cold feet. I hate to get myself involved in situation like this where by I can't gauge an outcome at all.
Well and what did the old folks say? I should really be just working and spending time with family and friends just like what I did post the previous relationship a.k.a. "The disaster". Back to where I was, so this mind bogging situation started when I realised that there are some pretty wicked history similar but not comparable to what I've gone through. Now knowing that I am pretty good at forgiving (ie: being a sucker), I think I have a large tendency to get myself into trouble again.
It is not about having a bad past because I believe some could escape and eventually find new life. Some continue to abuse it as if everyone else is just part of the game and can be used as a tool to achieve their satisfaction. After surviving my previous disaster I could probably be a guru at teaching people how to spot a cheater. Alright jokes aside, the reason I'm writing this is because I am again considering to build a relationship concurrently as I build my career hence commitment level is high and a lot of mutual understanding is required. Knowing the fact that I require heaps of attention and security I doubt I could find anyone that fits in the picture hence I made a vow to stay single and enjoy life to the fullest and report to no one except maybe my Saviour, Lord.
In terms of statistics I might be lucky to experienced disastrous partner(s) which I've treated them as soul mate (just like what you read in fairy tales "happily ever after") but in actual fact you wished you were never born when you realised you have to wear that gigantic "green" hat. So now as I continue to journey through this young adult life, should I pursue to take a peek in the black hole or should I just avoid, knowing that nothing will survive in it?
"Trust must be earned"
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