Halt

Someone pulled the handbrakes and the cart would have to simply come to a standstill. The journey came to an end with friendship being built then knocked down later on. I have no comments over the last couple of weeks. I was chasing after my career and at the same time leaving all else to God's will.

I also know that my blog is the main culprit and killer, not the first time. I still remember back then when a friend of mine in Oz had me as a shelter/rebound before embarking on a new relationship. I felt like I'm doing charity being a temporary comfort to those seeking a pillar to lean on.

Well alas nothing was achieved but another life lesson learned. Never hand out your sincerity unless it is proven to be worth it. To end this it has to be the famous quote: Giving up doesn't mean you are weak, sometimes it just mean you are strong enough to let go.

Perspective

Just postponed my meeting as I had this uneasy feeling and I couldn't focus on selling my ideas. On this rainy night, some might have misunderstood the entire perspective of my previous post. I've always think that a blog should be read in the author's perspective and not the reader's perspective. This is also my main reason of keeping this blog to myself and not shared among friends or relatives.

It is utterly idiotic to make assumptions and start pointing fingers without really understanding the points which formed the entry. I wasn't making any comparison, complaining or pin-pointing anyone. It is merely for the sake of putting pieces of thoughts together like mosaic to form a related story.

Well, I must say this was a tragic incident where words were twisted and taken personal. It wasn't intentional but I realized the damage was done after a short conversation over the phone. To be honest, past should be be left as it is and not brought up. I am not interested in knowing the history be it good or bad. What matter is really the future, however with some stumbling blocks and insufficient understanding it is hard to actually build a bond between two mankind. It requires both to think in accord and of course mutual understanding.

Unfortunately things weren't smooth as of now with various component mismatching. I would like to sincerely apologise should there be any unpleasant word or examples given but on the other hand I would like to share my 2 cents that this is merely my point of view looking forward and therefore from a third party view it will be an obvious bias inclination in taking positions or sides.

-there is always two sides of a story-

Something for Post-it Note

Pain makes you stronger,

Fear maker you braver,

Heartbreak makes you wiser.

Black Hole

I have a feeling I am approaching a black hole, something that everyone talks about but yet no one knows what is inside a black hole. I've never felt like this for a very long time. The uncertain feeling is creepy.

I'm often overseeing and in a clear state of mind that what I'm getting myself into but this time I sorta went a lil too far as if I'm walking in a mine field blind folded. This is seriously giving me cold feet. I hate to get myself involved in situation like this where by I can't gauge an outcome at all.

Well and what did the old folks say? I should really be just working and spending time with family and friends just like what I did post the previous relationship a.k.a. "The disaster". Back to where I was, so this mind bogging situation started when I realised that there are some pretty wicked history similar but not comparable to what I've gone through. Now knowing that I am pretty good at forgiving (ie: being a sucker), I think I have a large tendency to get myself into trouble again.

It is not about having a bad past because I believe some could escape and eventually find new life. Some continue to abuse it as if everyone else is just part of the game and can be used as a tool to achieve their satisfaction. After surviving my previous disaster I could probably be a guru at teaching people how to spot a cheater. Alright jokes aside, the reason I'm writing this is because I am again considering to build a relationship concurrently as I build my career hence commitment level is high and a lot of mutual understanding is required. Knowing the fact that I require heaps of attention and security I doubt I could find anyone that fits in the picture hence I made a vow to stay single and enjoy life to the fullest and report to no one except maybe my Saviour, Lord.

In terms of statistics I might be lucky to experienced disastrous partner(s) which I've treated them as soul mate (just like what you read in fairy tales "happily ever after") but in actual fact you wished you were never born when you realised you have to wear that gigantic "green" hat. So now as I continue to journey through this young adult life, should I pursue to take a peek in the black hole or should I just avoid, knowing that nothing will survive in it?

"Trust must be earned"

寶貝

Humming this song and smiling as I work because I know someday I'll have you as my "寶貝".

Blessed Birthday

Dad, you're the greatest man I know in my entire life to raise me up till this day. I owe that to you and may the Lord continue to be with you and shelter you from evil. On your birthday I pray that blessings would shower upon you may your life be joyful everyday.

God bless you Pappa.

Fishing all day long

I'm extremely tired after my trip and I was literally dozing off every hour staring at my PC. This is my first day being a new born Christian and I am seriously not performing well. I really pray that I would be strong and persevere throughout the week. I've got heaps of work waiting for me to clear them off my log.

Besides just talking about stressful days that I've encounter. I would like to also touch on my gathering last night with my Uni mates. I've also brought along a friend to join the gang and I hope they blend in well. Afterall you get to know more about someone when you blend in with their circle of friends.

Prayer of the day

I've recently experience minimal amount of sleep, but I thank God for being able to bring me through the day. Just like how it should be in our daily life, in everything give thanks. Life is not an evergreen journey. Rough patches is almost inevitable but it is how we react towards it and surf through the problems in life.

As much as I recalled, I thought I was being punished so severely by God and I felt that I have been treated unfairly. No doubt life was never a fair game to start with but the God which I've been consistently cried out for actually allowed me to fall in a pitch black pit. I was in search for an answer but after spending quality time in my sanctuary, the house of God. I realised that sometimes God allocates the best in his eyes and not through mine. Knowing that my prayers continue daily, my deepest desires I commit and live a life of a single commoner.

My partner is someone whom I will love deeply foreva and I've made that promised to God that whoever is right is not important but make me the right person for someone else. That is the greatest sacrifice of all because I've put myself out to love just like how it should be. Since I have trained myself to be really patient in this matter, I'll wait and discover along the way on where I'll end up to.

My career life had a soar last year and new opportunities had been coming. Again I give praise for that. I just hope I could have enough to sponsor my family and the future spouse of mine a comfortable living. If God walks with me, there is really nothing I should be worried about.

Dear God, you've been an ever great God which stood by me, forgive my ignorance and sins. I thank you for all the blessings and may you continue to shower them upon people around me. Let me be the salt and light, the goodness overflows from the inside out. In your awesome name, Amen.

Tira-Miss-U

Last Saturday was simply awesome being able to catch up with this special friend of mine. Special in a way that the occasion that brough us to know each other and over such long period of time without actually seeing each other. Anyway the jizz of the outing was me being able to get to know my friend a little more over at one of my favourite restaurant in town. Alexis is the place and as usual i expect the highly demanded cake to run out. To be honest I felt like dancing in cloud 9 at a cozy place with a wonderful company.

Last Friday Night

I was all excited to start gaining momentum in life whereby I start to put myself out to test the waters. I was invited by my high school mates to crash over at their regular desk in Library. However what struck me was an unplanned dinner arrangement with a friend whom I've known for 8 years but yet to meet in person. I've enjoyed the time getting to know each other a little more, as anticipated we were both acting a little wierd because it was our first meeting. Later on we proceeded with the beer session and with no surprise I brought along my dinner buddy.

We had great fun as my high school mates were regular and we managed to get to know the band members which were performing that night. The night did not just end at where we were because someone has suggested that we crash a friend's b'day party over at Zouk. So we headed to Zouk partially hibernating. When we arrived it was around 10mins before 3am. The party is still going on and this is the place where men and women gel together and all the action happens. I was not spared in Zouk as I was trying to walk through the crowd in the dance floor I was being kidnapped by a random girl from a group of 6 girls and my wonderful buddies left me there. How the kidnapp scene happened? One girl grabbed my hand and pulled me right into the wall formed by the 6 semi-high ladies. So I just have to robot dance my way out, seriously I must admit, I was excited because it further confirms that hey if nobody wants me at least I was wanted for a moment in the crowd.

Me being me not interested in a come and go relationship decided not to even know them. So I guess they think I'm either gay or simply too arogant to even join them for some fun. That is basically all about last Friday night.

Dream loved by the Ants

I can still remember vividly the dream I had last night.

It was the best ever dream I had and that virtual image was locked in my head that I wished I do not have to wake up. There was an old saying that what you've always had in mind and constantly think about will often appear in your dreams because the brain is not fully at rest and the active ones will just puzzle up images that you've consistently imagined. I guess pretty bee must have been spinning round my head too much that a love story was playing during my sleep.

If only it was more than just a dream...

"Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous, there's really nothing to lose."

Future Marriages

Soon wedding will look like this...

Priest: Do you agree to change your FB status from single to married?

Guy: YES.
... ......
Girl: YES.
.
.
.

Priest: I now announce you husband & wife. You may poke the bride.

Work-Live-Learn-Play

Many times I was put into situation or rather my job has always been in situation where I play the puppet show between both my clienteles and my management. My job is to basically originate deals from thin air and try to make sure that something cooks up. Trapping in between the Bank and clients makes me a conduit acting as a channel to twist and turn in order to please both sides.

No doubt I love being a generalist originator so I won't limit myself in the Debt Capital Markets playground and I could even explore possible M&As or even trade deals. Afterall the bank value their employee simply from the figures brought in. As a Gen Y we often seek a balance lifestyle of work-live-learn-play. However in the real and cruel world hardly any firm would give you the room to take a break let alone play. As a Gen Y I do wish I could have a balance lifestyle but I do understand the rigid rules in life therefore I'm perfectly fine at this point of time being put into tough conditions and hopefully this mould a better me in the near future.

At this point besides saving there is just not much opportunity in life yet. I'm still trying to increase my personal equity in some investments and hopefully a property during the property bubble pop rumoured to be soon. I've only spotted properties that I can't yet afford but looking further I think a landed property seems to be a better bet for a no brainer investment.

As for now I'll just have to beef up and continue to be strong. Salary comes to the people who can perform best (assuming meritocracy takes place) and of course to pray for the best as a faithful child of God.

停

在忙碌的上班世界里，
我要得只是短短的几分钟，
停下来。

总是想念那期待着下班，匆匆忙忙赶回家的日子。。。全都是因为有个人让我特别的想念。

Post-BKK trip

I was amazed that this time around BKK I didn't shop much, In fact I just took the time to accompany my buddies and bringing them around since none of them have been to Bangkok and none actually plan the trip. So we just play by ear waking up every morning to decide where is our next destination.

I enjoyed this trip as I get to see the changes in Bangkok. Lumphini one of my favourite place in Bangkok has been torn down as they've closed down due to the maturity of their lease. Hopefully on my next trip they will reopen at a better location. Thailand is most likely experiencing high inflation as things were no longer cheap as compared to my spending last year. I can no longer get a bargain meal and the price haggling seems to be tougher.

Thats all for now as I have to follow up with a couple of deals in hand.

KUL-BKK

Tonight I'll be departing from KUL to my next destination BKK for a short getaway. I'm taking advantage of this festive holiday to catch up with my uni mates except this time we are meeting at a place that we are all not too familiar.

Rule No. 1

Single guy rule No. 1: Thou shalt not rush into a new relationship.

Marriage and the "Side Effect"

As I was reading this article from Gawker, I couldn't help but to share it. I find it a little hilarious however it does make some sense. To be fair I do think men put on a fair bit of weight if they are being well taken care of by their other half. Enjoy the read.

A new study that followed more than 10,000 people for 22 years showed that women tend to gain weight in the two years following getting married and men typically gain weight two years after getting divorced. Every couple is doomed!

The scientists behind the Ohio State University study attribute the weight gain in women to having more duties around the house after tying the knot, which gives them less time to exercise. They don't take into account the months of dieting, starvation, and idiotic juice cleanses that women endure so that they will not have one ounce of back fat on their wedding day. Once the honeymoon sets in, that weight is going right back where it was and will probably get even worse. We blame you, bridal industrial complex!

For men, there is apparently a "health benefit" to being married, which disappears after divorce. The health benefit, it seems, is a wife who forces you to eat green food and tells you that living off of beer, Hot Pockets, and Cool Ranch Doritos is not a suitable alternative for an adult living as a human being in the universe.

There's only one solution to staying thin forever: don't get married! It's simple, people.

Up in Heaven

Dear Lord,

Up in Heaven I know you are watching each and every actions that we've made. I just want to let you know, my buddy a pretty and sweet lady is leaving to Singapore soon and deep down in my heart you would've know what I wanted but I'm leaving it behind because truly I want to wish her all the best. Lord you will take care of her worries and you'll make her realised that you can be somewhere in the equation of life hence I commit her life to you Lord that you will continue to guide her and watch over her.

Many thanks, and in your mighty name.
Amen.

早

Haven't woke up early during for a period of time as i usually sleep in after working hard for the entire week. Today was an exception because I've actually went to MC for 1 1/2 days due to some serious flu & fever.

No doubt life lately has brought me to a test of faith which I've sorta reached the verge of contemplating whether its worth the effort and time spent with God. However action speaks louder than words. I've worked my way to church despite being sick and persevere through it. The story doesn't end there. I felt awfully terrible the next day and I insist on heading to work as I had an appointment with a listed co,'s Financial Controller. I was told by my bosses to take the day off and cancel the meeting however without me making the decision, I prayed. God answered and the Financial Controller called to postponed the meeting till a later date.

Today, I've recovered nearly as I've a wonderful team of people praying for me light speed recovery. I have to as well because I'll be out the entire day from lunch till late. Meeting up with a bunch of church mates for lunch, follow by church, dinner and movie late at night.

I'm really quite ignorant to doors opened as I've come to a stage where my focus lies on my career and hoping God will naturally put my other concerns into place. Never have I failed to love my previous partners well just that they went off track hence sometimes I would think that in comparison with the meaning of true love defined as love till death do us apart, I've totally no problem abiding simple covenant like this.

Just before I end my note here. Being a gentleman, I would like to dedicate maybe a line or two on my clean space to my ex-gf whom had found new love with a London born Chinese which she met during her cousin's wedding a month ago. They were both the best man and bridesmaid during the event. So I shall give my best blessings to them and may the love last forever.

The attention

匆

夜深了，还在办公室的我也开始累了。
年纪大了，开始觉得蛮多的时间都浪费在错的人。
但。。。

走得最急的，都是最美的风景；伤得最深的，也总是那些最真的感情​。

Third of August

White lie, black lie, polka dotted lie... a lie is still a lie

Beyond the line:
I came up with this line this morning as I was humming songs with my earphones on in the train catching lotsa uninvited attention. This line simply pass my mind because somehow I believe we are vulnerable creatures when it comes to emotion related matters. We should always manage expectations regardless of the signs which we receive from another homosapien. Afterall most of us love to have the feeling of being wanted and hence we do get signals which we might think its a green light only to find that we are running into a wall.

Moral:
Be straight forward and stop beating around the bush, if you don't intend to take responsibility on words being said then don't even give the slightest hope to your "admirer".

Let me guess, I have an appointment this Friday for lunch and I strongly believe it will be called off even if my ex don't I will as I find it not appropriate to be lunching with someone having a long distance relationship, she will also tell me all sorta nonsense bla bla bla I was the one she truly love back then..... hence the verdict is not to attend the lunch appointment when time comes.

Crazy

Hell of a song which is more than meaningful.

I was just speaking to a friend during dinner that I heard that my ex hooked up with another guy and apparently fell head over heels. He was congratulating me and saying that I should probably start taking bold steps and live a better life instead of being the nice guy which ends up looking as if I'm unwanted.

As I was saying this, coincidentally I was being bless with opportunities and whether or not it materialized I shall not put much expectations as I was trained well to manage clientele's expectations. Nonetheless my emotional feelings for the day stinks for a moment but turned into joy in no time.

Note: Don't forget to click the pause button below before you enjoy this wonderful piece of music.

Full stop

I was previously hesitating to put a full stop to this blog of mine. I don't published it nor do I go around telling people I have a blog. None the less I am glad I didn't end it as I am a strong believer that memories should be stored in one way or another. Some stored physical items which signifies certain important event or person.

I've been away for quite awhile busy with work with some travelling involved, morphing into a suitcase banker. Well I must say much happened during the hiatus moment. I didn't just went missing in action as I could still meet my buddies once in awhile. However I was more of mind blogger whereby I've sort of brainstormed what I wanted to blog and stored in one of the corners of my mind. I kept reminding myself to at least blog walk my own blog to at least try to add some colours to my ever clean blog.

I've managed to at least made an effort to revive this blogosphere and hopefully I will come back with a little more salt and light of life to share with some of you who still enjoys listening to my playlist everynow and then.

Cheers.

Wicked toons

How do you expect kids to listen to their parents as, Tarzan lives half naked, Cinderella comes back home at midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time, Aladdin is the king of thieves, Batman drives at 320KM/h, Sleeping beauty is lazy and Snow white lives with 7 guys. We shouldn’t be surprised if kids misbehave at times! I was brought up this way, how about you?

Playground

I'm sure each and everyone of us deep inside would like to have attention or even the love the our heart is longing for. However let us not take it too seriously and be really cautious as the number of players in the field is just too much for you to handle. The scariest part is they will never ever look like one and always appear to be the nice partner that you've always wanted. Well when the job is done on the bed, everything comes back to reality.

Some might think I'm exeggerating, I'm not and I don't mean to spoil the playground for players. If they are really that good and people are dumb enough to fall for them I guess somebody has to pay the price to learn in the real world. This blog post was basically inspired by a friend whom I was talking to over the weekend about how we spend our last 7-8 years. As time passes, human changes. My friend is now in the pro league for players and just a note she is a lady.

She is currently happy living the no strings attached just temporary high kind of lifestyle. Even she herself was telling me how sinful it is but addiction to it keeps her in the loop. Well I can't do much influence in a positive way but I told her, what goes around comes around. When you are on the upper hand manipulating love don't abuse it and you better pray one day when real love triggers you, the other party ain't fooling around.

How have you been managing your personal life in this fun filled playground? Is there a turning point where one will change or will the stained be permanent?

Five "A" Ten

Just had a wonderful time out with the boys and girls I know back when I was in my teenage years. It wasn't a big a crowd which is a good thing. We had beer after our dinner session. The beer session turn into a counseling session to a friend of mine as he is not too happy with his relationship. Well the end of the story was to break up if he ain't happy. No point wasting time with a girl that doesn't appreciate you. After all he is a doctor, tons of girls would want to date a doctor. We just can't stand seeing a friend coming out being controlled by the girl friend and totally have no dignity at all as a man. We hope that our helpful advise will wake him up from dying for a girl that is afraid to tell her friends that she is attached. Why waste time being in a relationship with a girl that would like to assume a life with a single status. Talking about it just reminded me that the reality in this ugly world is that most girls nowadays has crappy attitude/character. They complain about not able to find good guys and being hurt by the playas but when they meet a good guy they whine about these guys being too good, not compatible or they start cheating on these poor souls. You can never understand girls can you?

Quarter year

Passing the first quarter of the year in a blink of an eye. I was busy fighting for the one thing that most guys at my age is doing which is "CAREER". Manage to cling on a few potential deals this month. Apart from that I've also celebrated my Mum's birthday on 23rd of the month.

I'm currently at Starbucks Tropicana sipping my coffee and doing my CFA studies. I like to keep my blog open even without updating it. I just let the playlist run on an on until I eventually fall asleep. Shall just end my post here as I have to get back to my studies giving myself too much slack.

Purge

I wasn't feeling well towards the end of the day. My guess was I had food poisoning from eating some overnight food. I was literally finding help calling friends and parents as I can't take a ride on a public train home due to the constant purging. To my surprise my parents rushed to town and get me home and before I could do anything I fell asleep on the couch. Woke up to find that I'm no longer purging and had some food and lots of fluid intake to recover from the outflow. I'm glad that I've prayed and was answered although not an immediate healing but I think I can look forward attending meetings tomorrow.

Well when you are in need of help it is the best time to put your friendship/relationship to a test. People who care is worth loving the rest you can probably put them in cold storage. Not sure whether anyone is aware of the fine prints on all investment link products. I find this line very true that "past performance should not be taken as an indication of future results". You may also use it on friendship "past relationship should not be taken as an indication of future intimacy".

The Fukushima Fifty

When I heard the news that about 180 of the TEPCO staffs volunteered to stay back and do whatever they can to avoid overheating and further explosion, my heart and mind sunk into deep emotional realm. The last time I had this kind of feeling was probably the break up three years back but this time for "The Fukushima Fifty" I cannot describe the emotional condition that I've got myself into.

The Fukushima Fifty, 181 heroes of Japan are rotating in shifts of 50 a group working in the worst condition you can ever imagine, running out of food and water, fighting fatigue dragging themselves to work on the wreckage of the cooling system. They continued to work even at the peril of their own lives. All of them know the hazards well yet they take on the responsibility. Leaving their loved ones behind and going on such mission is never easy especially knowing that you won't be back. Tears rolling, text messages telling their loved ones to be strong because they won't be home anytime soon. Already on the book were 5 deaths, 21 injured and more than 20 exposed to excessive radiation and some of them missing. Another touching true life stody would be a worker whom would retire in six months had also stayed back.

Basically their mission is "Feed and Bleed". Feeding the overheated reactors with seawater while steam bleeds away the heat. Knowing what is at stake and they are doing whatever is humanly necessary to make these plants in safe condition. Deep inside I'm praying for them to have minimal suffering. Destined to suffer from all the illness for overexposing to radiation or immediate death, they stood by during the critical hours as the nations last hope or maybe even the region's last hope.

I took my time off from work just to write this down not solely because I'm touched but I respect them and they deserve greater credit than just a write up. Take a moment of your time to even ponder upon your life. Have you done anything close to giving up your life just to save your loved ones? Do you even have the guts to take the risk with thin chances of sucess?

LOVE is sacrifice. LOVE is brave. LOVE knows no boundaries.

All in the month of LOVE

February is such an eventful month. I'll just sum up the events that are still fresh in my mind.

Chinese New Year:
Stayed in KL this year and manage to visit some friends and relatives in town.

Valentines:
Manage to ordered a wedding bouquet for my "Eve".

Adam & Eve:
A church event to encourage men to be more spirutual and attractive to "Eves in Church".

McKitt's open house:
Catch up session with the Uni mates and roast lamb is the bomb! Aunty Zhannie also introduced IOI's Financial Controller to me.

Lou Hei @ Equitorial:
A BEA staff lunch consist of only 5 pax.

Lou Hei @ Pav:
Met up with Shen Yin, WaiWai and Nick at Pav for dinner and Lou Hei. A memorable catch up session and first time riding in Nick's CLK.

Closing of Chinese New Year @ Aunty Tracy's:
Free flow of alcohol on a Thursday night causing a hangover the next morning.

Prayer Night:
On the guitar with Josh that night during worship. Learned to pray our heart out.

ENT Specialist appointment @ Assunta,
Met Dr. Chang after almost a decade, got a discounted bill which still cost about RM400 for approx 20mins consulatation and medication. Right ear blockage due to back flow of phlegm.

Farewell dinner for Eugene:
Dine in at Sanuki Udon 9 pax on me. Follow by Delicious, Bangsar for dessert and end with cards and private chat session till 4a.m. Bon Voyage Eugene.

DNA Class @ Church:
Woke up early in the morning for a 2.5 hours DNA class.

Eat.Smile.Bless @ Sunway Mas:
Joined the awareness campaign for Generasi Gemilang to promote the presence in Sunway Mas.

*REMINDER: STUDY HARD(ER) for the rest of the months in the first half of the year 2011. Love more as I was encourage to reveal and confess my love and respond to Dr.Chew's message to act now before it is too late.

Happy Chinese New Year

I've not been here for ages and it seems like it is accumulating dust and cobwebs here. I've just realised that Twitter updates ain't working on my blog. I can't be bothered at the moment but if you guys want to know what is going on you could add me @gabrielloh on Twitter.

This Chinese New Year I've stayed back in KL (I usually go down south to Kluang,Johor). The reason being my pets, I've got three dogs and non of them get along with each other. I don't want to see any casualties leaving them at home and coming home to see one died fighting. Staying back in KL also helps me keep up with my studies, manage to start on Economics today and hopefully finish it by next week.

For those traveling do take good care on the road. May the Lord be with you. Be good and be patient if you have bad cards in hand. Happy Chinese New Year.

Confirmation

Instead of asking God all the time before we use the wisdom God gave us to think for ourselves, we should really make good use of the intelligence God planted in us. I've gained confirmation today on my action, as we all know Newton's law for every action there is a reaction. I tested on a reaction and had a confirmation from God to get back on my feet and go forward to a new frontier. Haha, being good can be at a disadvantage because people might use it against me but I've learned to not get exploited.

Got head hunted today by a recruiter for a job as an investment banker at a leading Japanese bank. I've yet to indicate my interest as I wanted to know more detail. I'm not planning to leave my job anytime soon as I'm gaining my grounds here. In the near future I would have to buck up with the studies and be lovable creature in church. Whatever is outstanding in my life unanswered, I shall not bother because I don't care about the outcome now. At least deep down in my heart I know I did my best, I'll leave it to God to do the rest.

Synchronizing

Disagreement happens when an opinion differs from the other. Same goes to a relationship. There are a million ways to pick a fight or quarrel but what it takes to settle things is actually a step back. Ultimately is the loving heart that crave for love and nothing else. As I step into my mid twenties, I've realised that I've gone through so much to get my where I am today with a pretty decent job and wonderful friends who can understand that I need to take time off to church. God sent me an angel lately who motivated me to study harder despite knowing that it is too ambitious for me to take up this finance paper but it is the presence of this person that I'm motivated to move out of my comfort zone and commit my 2 hour a day book worming. Anyway that is not the highlight of this blog post. I'm just day dreaming after office hour preparing myself to study 2 hours before I head home and this image of two person walking and talking to each other hit me and I intepret it as a love message reminding me that I should go after that person by first synchronizing myself and move in accord.

*If you walk and talk with someone, eventually you will synchronize your steps with each other.

Ms. Katy

G: Miss, are you Katy Perry?
B: Why?
G: 'cuz you're my Teenage Dream
B: *sweetest smile*

G-Gabe
B-Bee

Sports night

I've just taken another missed on my regular sports night. This also means that for more than a month I've been missing basketball. I manage to make up for it by sweating it out on some hiking and this week I'm heading for hiking on Saturday again. Hopefully the cough wouldn't stop me from going the distance.

Hopefully by downing this cough mixture I can heal as soon as possible and continue to sing to you my Lord, going to church with a mask on is just too awkward lately and when the music is playing I feel like singing out but the cough just ruined everything lately. Sorry Lord.

Good night

I've not wish everyone Good night for ages. I'm a little sick due to the weather so I'm heading to bed right now. God bless the lovable people and may I get well soon.

Wound

I usually stay online to read on articles and get myself up to date with the happenings around. Most of the time I read on something juicier to keep me awake after a couple of serious articles. Some of the juicy ones I read recently involves affair and of course those idiotic ones. You'll be surprised if you read about affairs. It happens probably more often than you could imagine and they might be your neighbor or worst still your partner. I really pity the other half of these selfish A-holes. A lot of times these victims fall from peak to pit because their world have been turned upside down. Likewise if I were to put myself in their shoe it would be the same however due to the grace of God I've crawled out from a pit before and now I'm pretty numb hence moving on is way easier. Life should definitely be this way because to me if a relationship doesn't work I won't bother giving it a second thought. I've build myself up against this kinda issue and I've also learned that on average out of 10 people more than half will be in one way or another unworthy to be good to. I'm not encouraging anyone to hate these people but I think we should set good examples and send a clear message to people whom cheats. Typically I would ignore them totally because by entertaining these people I felt disgusting. Affair happens in a relationship when one is a total idiot and the other don't realize. I've got involve as a victim role before, nothing much to shout about except maybe my accurate six sense which help me realize before I was a sucker. Another lesson learned through that nasty incident was also my tolerance and sincerity in love. I must say I'm proud of my attitude. Now I'm all good but I seriously don't know if I am healed or I can't feel my wound at all.

"A wound unfelt is a wound unhealed."

Soaring Joy

Last night there was this combine zone cell meeting and I get to meet a lot of new people. However there is one that I'm looking forward to meet. She is a wonderful friend of mine that gave me a hug on Saturday. As most of you would know I've probably been single for too long hence then hug instantly melts my heart. Anyway cut the long story short I got another good bye hug last night. Made me a little too happy for a moment. After coming back to my senses it is just a friendly hug and there is nothing more than that.

On Tuesday night, I've met up with this super handsome friend of mine Nick. I call him the ladies man. He got his grooves and girls would just stick to him like glue. He was showing me his friends on his Iphone and those girls are gorgeous not to mention some of them are rich. We chat over dinner and catch up on things going on. Haha and he had this funny resolution for the year 2011. He wants to stay single this year. Can you imagine people are begging to get attached and his wish is to stay single for a year. See the difference between a ladies men and ordinary folks?

Gaining Trust

I'm recently improving at work, not just by physical hours. With the help from my Country Manager and General Manager I'm improving at work as I get to understand more on the entire work that I'm working on. This also makes me look forward in putting in my first few credit proposals for this year and hopefully with the support I can push through these deals that is worth millions to cushion and expand the loan books of my bank.

While meeting KPIs are important at work, meeting God's KPIs are equally important. I've actually fixed my heart to serve unfortunately I can't serve financially yet as I've great responsibility in sending my younger sister to University in June. I'm placing an all in call with my finances for her studies. I've given consent to her and my entire family that I support her cost of living and tuition fees in Uni, She would be pursuing Traditional Chinese Medicine course. She would be a Sensei upon graduation. I pray that she would do well in her course and not take me as experiment for all the acupuncture training.

As for today, I woke up around 11am, did a couple of hours reading and pondering. Last but not least I've updated my blog.

Hug

A hug is good enough to bring me to cloud 9

Twenty Eleven

When you stepped into this new year did you tell yourself that this will be a year to reach greater heights or did you just let it be as if it is just another day in life? I've been taking some precious time off at the end of the year to ponder on my life till the latest second. I'm still pretty much the same except maybe my faith in God which grew throughout the year as I participated more in various church activities.

I've met different people throughout the year and also learned that one should always guard their heart. I was at one point of time think that I might be venturing into a new relationship infact a long distanced relationship which I myself know it will not work out. It happened so quickly that we planned a trip to a place where we both would have the time to get away from our job and ofcourse fall in love again. It didn't worked out eventually which I sort of foresee when communication between us hit a bumpy road.

This year ofcourse I've a whole long list of things that I wish I could achieve some reachable goals and some not. I hope my relationship with parents would grow stronger and I could be a blessing to them, career advancement, grow to a next level in Christ and to settle down with one lovely soul. Thats about it this year, simple wishes that requires plenty of hard work and faith to achieve. How about yours?

*We all learn how to walk with countless falls. Life is about getting up and walk again and in later stage run. There maybe mistakes and unfortunate events coming to us as if the whole world is against you but overcoming it makes us better and who knows we may be more attractive.

Eve in the presence of the Lord

I've spent my first new years eve in Church. I don't know why... I could have stayed at my friend's place for bbq but there is a calling in my heart. Not for anyone else but the Lord. I do have to admit there is this special rhythm going on in my heart for someone in Church but I do not appear in the Church for the sake of getting noticed. I'm going to church as I've grown deeper and seek different things in life. I've got a journey to go. My career is one of the biggest challenge for me this year. I need to thank a few people, namely Kah Soon for being such a great Church mate, Celine, WaiLeng and others who prayed for me. I'm thankful to have known you people without you people I might not have been who I am today.